Is it the end of the world again?

Hello, humans. It has been quite some time since I have posted a blog update...

As most of you already know by now, Steve is dead. The other kitties and I have been left behind. Shelby (aka bitch) is no longer with us, and is at some other ladies' house. I call that a victory but I find the need to not.. He might have been the worst owner but he's now the best. The Second Human (aka Babe) has been taking care of us, but she has been very depressed since Steve's passing.

Anyways, yesterday I thought it was the end of the world again! Those filthy humans were at it again with the bombs. Me and the other kitties hid for our lives while we let the humans destroy themselves. I later learned it was something called "fireworks". I noticed Random Kitty being an absolute maniac, so I terrified her by saying "we're all going to die,". Of course, she believed it and ran for cover. It's still pretty fun messing with my idiotic siblings.

One of the fireworks was very loud, and it even hurt the human's ears! Luckily there was no damage and the human race sadly lives on today.

Acting Strange, Are We?

Is Steve okay? He's been acting up lately.

This isn't normal of Steve, at least I think. Acting strange, stress buying, I mean, we even have a lot of this weird, yet very playful, white fur in our bathroom. I think it's called "toy-let paper". Him and the other human also never leave the house. They're just here like they're waiting for something. He keeps forcing me to do a Talking Kitty video... but hasn't been asking like he usually does. He also doesn't talk to neighbours or anything. They also hardly go get food, and it's only once a week. He says we should ration our food to preserve it, or whatever. Good news, though, he let me on the computer again. And it's also a new one! Actually, there's two.. but still.

Anyways, that's about all I have to say. Life really hasn't been meaningful for a cat, at least now, anyways. I'll just wait this out and see what happens with my weird owners. Steve should be at his job. No idea why he isn't. He's also been really sad lately. Quite frankly it makes me happy. I got into a fight with him a while ago and he grounded me. That's why there's been a long wait. So if it makes you happy, yes, I'm okay. 

Confusing Times

I'm so confused... what???

Okay. I'm posting this now because I'm confused. What the hell is a "coronavirus"?? I overheard the big black thing (human term: T.V.) and Steve talking about it. Apparently he says people have died from it? I have no clue. If anything, I hope the others get it. I was researching online and found this. I have no idea what it is, but it's some sort of map thing. We live in our priso- er.... I mean home, and I believe we are safe from this thing. I have no idea why people are so scared of it. It's just so petty and stupid to be afraid of something so small. Humans are just too over-dramatic about little things, like Steve.


Speaking of Steve, he's been acting strangely. I think he took some of my catnip, because he's having weird mixed emotions. He goes from being completely fine and happy to very sad to the point he'll ignore GG and Shelby (there's a first for everything.) and we have no idea why. For the first time I'm worried for him. I don't want him to leave us, because I need my daily wet food ever since I was fired from my job. He was released from prison a few weeks ago, luckily. Damn Gibbyson was being a pest. I can see so much of Gibson in him it's insane. Same damn fears, except he's more willing to try. The white stuff called "snow" has been getting better. It's cold, though. Sometimes I feel like I'm going to freeze. I really do hope not. 3 lives left isn't good.



Anyway, I have nothing else to say except life's been neutral. I still hate my siblings, don't get me wrong.

I think I'll go beat up Random just for the sake of it.

Steve Went Too Far..

I hate Steve! He keeps invading my privacy! 


Steve keeps invading my privacy! I saw what he was doing on Facebook, and he has a bunch of pictures of me as a baby!! He's been invading it since I've been BORN! This is out of hand. I know Steve's an ass, but I didn't know he was this level of ass. Not even Bitch is that dumb. I am so pissed off right now, I could just run away. Unfortunately, I can't do that.


Soon, I will be at Todd's. I wish I could just run away, but his house is too far away for me to go on foot. And, plus, I'd probably be caught by the guys with the net.



Gibbyson keeps being a little shit and annoying me. Other than that, things have been swelling.

Uh-oh...

The Horrible Life Of Me

Oh, what a bunch of shit this is. My weekend and the week before that have been then worst! All the cats have been rude, and Steve's been so depressed he forgot to feed me for two days! I'm going to call animal abuse on him, and hopefully, they'll take that demon away from me. Bitch was let outside and didn't return for 3 hours. My humans eventually found her outside laying down. What an absolute idiot. Gibbyson hasn't really bothered me, but the other day he ate some of my food, which pissed me off. Random is hiding up in who-knows-where. GG is being an annoying slut, so I treated her like one with a few of my bitch slaps.


The door to the big diary (human term: Computer) was accidentally blocked by the brown cube things. Steve said it had to do with some sort of work-related thing, where he had to move a bunch of boxes to our prison because they didn't have enough space for anything else. They fell in front of the door and blocked the way in. I really haven't gotten to move it myself, because my humans have been sticking me in this "catio". It's basically just a big kitty prison. The unmovable door (human term: cat flap) has stopped me from entering my solitary confinement. Steve finally managed to open the door, and accidentally broke a few of the cube things. He said that I couldn't go in there until he found a new place to store the boxes, and he did, but in the worse possible area: right next to my favorite chair. We've been getting a ton of snow, and it sometimes even makes sounds and hits the side of the house. When that happens, I've learned to run because the boxes fall right as the sound hits the house.

But I tried to escape via the catio. It was a perfect plan, and everything was going right until my paw got stuck in the netting. I was stuck for 15 minutes until I was finally free of my captivity. I wandered upstairs to my human's room and wondered if escaping through their wind-o was a logical choice. After further investigation (cat term: looking DOWN) I figured out that if I jump, I would lose a life, and I only have 4 left. So I eventually led Gibbyson upstairs and pushed him outside, and he fell. I heard a splat and managed to see his body turn inside-out and disappear. It was the second time I saw that happen. I was not amused. I then looked out the small door and stared at Bitch while she was laying down.
It was a joyous sight to see her sitting right in the middle of the brown liquid substance the humans call "mud". She tracked it in the house and the humans were understandably pissed off at the retard.


I've been sleepy, and right now I'm aching for a nap. Until next time.

GG's new addiction

GG has been more active than normal. She keeps smacking me whenever she sees me! I think it's because I said she's a screw...



Anyways, other than GG being a total bitch, my week has been good. I've smacked the other idiots a few times, so all things are good, Steve's given me wet food today even though he thinks I should be grounded (which I shouldn't), and I attempted to make my escape through a Wind O, but it was a complete fail.



Instead of escaping, I hurt my paw. Big deal, other than the fact that Steve has been more nice than usual. I feel threatened as he keeps locking the door. Today he forgot to lock the door, and I managed to get through. Bitch (human term: the dog) still continues to run into wall, and honestly it's pretty funny to watch the big "loyal companion" be such a dumbass.  Steve's been worried, though, as he says that the dog needs to be "put down" soon. Hopefully that means she'll be gone from my presence forever...

I've been more tired than I normally am. Probably because I've been beating the shit out of GG, but Steve continues to say that I'm "getting too old". The hell does that mean? I'm perfectly normal for my age! Steve just wants to be a massive dick about everything. I just wish he would stop.


My other human (human term: Babe) is hardly around anymore. She's at this human place called "work". I heard it's a place where they force humans into labor and don't allow them to eat. I've love to see Steve there, but he continues to stay home because of this dis-ease called "bye-poler dis order". I heard it makes you depressed.


Anyway, I'm being called by my Human Slave. The door will be closed for a few days. The brown cubes are being piled up on the side, so I think we're moving? I'm not sure. Oh, no.. I've got to get off now!

Forgot I had this blog..

Hello, humans.

I haven't said anything in a while because I forgot I had a blog. Stupid me.

Anyways, things have been normal. Lately I've been ignoring the retards. The small kitten (human term: GG) is being a bitch and is attacking me for whatever reason. I can't seem to figure out what I did to make her so pissed off.

Steve's been rude to me ever since I pulled that stunt in the Court. It wasn't my fault people thought he was an idiot, and it wasn't my fault that the F-P-I thing caught him stealing. Yet, of course, blame it on the animal. It's like humans only find something else to blame other than blaming themselves for their crime.

I've had dry food ever since, and he's been treating me like a servant. He's been so commanding. I feel like I've been turning into Bitch. Thing is, I'm not blind though. And I certainly don't run into wall like a dumbass.

I can't take this anymore..

I hate Gibbyson so much! He's so goddamn annoying! Today Steve gave us nom-noms, and he decided to eat mine too! After I beat the shit out of him, I decided to lay down on my favorite chair.

Random Kitty was being annoying, so I smacked her dumb head and told her to die, and she ran, and I haven't seen her since. But it doesn't end there. Gibbyson returned and I looked at him. We stared at each other for hours before he finally put his head down once Bitch (human term: the dog) tried to lick him.

I'm not going to say it was the worst day, but it certainly wasn't the best, either. Steve went to the store, so I'm getting off now since his car is pulling in. I haven't been on in a while since the door has been shut.

It's been a while.

Hello. It's been a while since I made my last blog post.

I've been grounded for something I didn't do. Gibbyson is the worst brother ever. I hate him. My owner apparently found his big computer thing (human term: PS4) broken. The cord connecting it to the electronic wall was chewed up.

Of course, I did it, but Gibbyson had the NERVE to be a dick and tell Steve.

New Blog

Hi. This is my second blog account. My name is Sylvester, as most of you know.

I'll be back tomorrow. Exactly 10 years ago, I created my very first blogspot. Sadly, I forgot the password. Oh. no.. Steve's calling my name.

I've got to go do a "Talking Kitty" video now. I really don't want to. but he said I'd be grounded if I didn't listen.